Cultivating Emotional Intelligence

When I was younger, it often seemed like people were intentionally misinterpreting me. Many women can relate to the strong urge to please others perfectly. We tend to diminish ourselves, give excessively, and often invest in situations that offer nothing in return. Many of us navigate the world as if we are always treading carefully, trying not to do too much or too little. We strive to avoid giving anyone a reason to dislike us.

Do you ever feel like you are battling semantics when trying to understand the world and interact with others? It seems people often use manipulation tactics to pull us away from our emotions, into our minds, and leave us emotionally stuck.

After many years of being quick-tempered and hot-headed, yet having a heart of gold, it finally dawned on me. I understood that many people do harmful things simply to provoke a reaction from us. I'm sure many of us recall learning similar lessons in school. During recess, when you're being chased by a group of boys, someone in charge advises you to just ignore them.

It took me years to grasp the concept of not reacting. When someone provokes us, it seems instinctive to express our anger when we're emotionally charged.

I've come to understand that there is strength in remaining silent. By carefully observing the person trying to provoke me, I can perceive them with a more enlightened perspective. Internally, I can psychologically analyze the exact reason this person is projecting or instigating an argument.

I don't claim to be a perfect person; I have my own flaws. I highly value the gift of discernment that develops through exploring emotional intelligence, but sometimes it's really about them, not you. I'm happy to share the positive impacts of nurturing emotional intelligence. I understand my intentions, so when others don't, it no longer bothers me. I know my heart's position, so when people judge me, I realize it reflects more on their issues than on me. I care less and less about what others are doing. I've learned to cultivate positive thoughts, so encountering certain people from my past doesn't affect me in the present moment.

I firmly believe that harnessing this power is the secret to success.